First,

Happy Birthday yukari_rin ~!

*confetti confetti confetti*

I hope everything is great with you and you get/have gotten tons of presents and gifts and I LOVE YOU. ;-;

I apologize to you and everyone else for not being on as much as I use to however I'm going to try my hardest to change all of that. Tomorrow we shall talk on AIM and try to make up for lost time. Fuji-wifey too of course~ I'm going to also try to respond to comments and posts later if not tomorrow at the very least so keep on the lookout, so to speak, everyone.

I just received your present and I'm just so touched wifey. Really. You have no idea. It's so beautiful. I love it.
I see this package and then I read "Rin" and I'm in shock. Not really because you didn't have my address but because it was from you. ♥ Also don't worry about it being late. You didn't have to get me anything so the fact that you did and all of that means so much.

Haha, at first I thought you made me some outfit to cosplay and I was all like :OOOO XD Then when I took it out completely and ahhhh. I love the pattern. I had to show everyone just so you know. They liked it too. You impressed the in-laws wifey! SCORE.

Also the letter was nice as well. I feel the same way about you but moar I tell you. MOAR.
It's like we said tons of times- "If only you were a guy...." Because they surely can learn a thing or two from you XD

I miss you and all of the f-list dearly. Now that I have your address as well, please expect a package coming to you soon. It will be late obviously but it will come. Though I'm not sure at all what to give you... *flails*

There's a lot more to say but I really can't form words right now so that's it for me. Thank you and tons of love for you wifey. (You deserve everything and more. We will hang out together one day and I'll prove it to youuu. It's a promise. What do you think about that Anti FeminismxHagakure December concert thing. I was thinking of going. You? Plz to be going..?) Once again Happy Birthday. And Halloween everyone. Enjoy. ♥

P.S. Is it really something you and me have? Because I really do like the idea of that. *laughs* Though I am thinking that fujiwara_san -will get something similar, if not one as as well, right? Because we are all wife-ies and everything~~ Also I'm going to whore it out like whoa. Just so you know. Tell your mom that she is talented and I adore it tons because oh how I do.

Okay let's try this again. Thank you for erasing everything and having me start over lj. Really. You remind me of one of the reasons of why I simply hate you :D

"Quick post" that I shouldn't be making for reasons that I'm screwing over right now but I had to dammit.

First off, I am alive I hope everyone is fine and everything is going great for them. Please do know that I think of each and every one of you and hope this is so every chance I get. If yes, I'm very glad and hope it continues that way because you absolutely deserve it and more. That statement couldn't be any truer because I picked a great f-list/group of friends and also, I like to think that I have good judgement on character and the like but that's kind of irrevelant huh? If not, please continue to fight and endure. Things surely will get better, if not now then later. We all go through those difficult times, it's only natural, and we all somehow rise in the end with lessons learnt and stronger selves. Do remember that you are not alone. You do have people who care about you and are there for you. Even if it's only interweb buddies since myself and others may feel that way at times haha. It's still something right? So everyone- let's all do our best and strive forward. ♥ *end happy happy utterly cheesy moment here*

Second, Kikuuuuuu and Fuji-wifeyyyyyy, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. ;-;

I absolutely adored your letter/card that my mother thought was from a boy named Bill and started to freak out over and the SasuSaku love, fujiwara_san . You are oh so creative slash talented and I can only have such admiration of such. Along with yearnings of having some myself XD But yes it filled me with much squee and I hope to do something just as great in return so please look forward to that. I owe you two by the way which I'm sure you know.

GAH. I always look forward to your gifts dearest kikuko_kamimura . I love how unique they are. The first that I received was needed very much. I haven't been able to get rest in either sense of the word and I think they did the trick. Especially the lavender. Even my mother was impressed. And as for my day of birth gifts- HEE. It took awhile to get them. My post office and men suck so bad. I had to wait a week to get them! I haven't read the book yet since I just got it but you can bet your ass I will. I remember you telling me about it so when I read the title I literally laughed and said YES! Awesome. XD I will definitely be telling you what I think . I briefly skimmed the pages and we share the same sense of humor which is great. Not that I needed any verifying since after countless long AIM chats, we pretty much established that fact and more. And, akdfjkdfjkdfjk, the doll. To be honest, she scared me at first. She kinda still does but not as much XD But in all I love the design. As I say times before you really are too kind but I am very grateful to have such a person in my life and I won't take it for granted that's for sure.

sahara_storm aka Sahara-chu, I love when you say that by the way/ more you know!, thank you for the wishes. I wish I could be there with you and distract you from all of that with my complete dorkiness and fail but alas the oceans! Make do with letters and cards yes?

Thank you to all. I miss you all. Rinny-wifey I don't know if I can go to NYAF. *cries* Also, we live in such a small world it seems. Also, hope things are going better and ;-; AIM plz.. And will update better next time. Pictures maybe? Take care you guys. ♥ 

Just have to say that 12012 is amazingly awesome and orgasmically hot .
The lead singer and guitarist SO looked at me.
If you haven't listened you should. That is all.
Now back to whatever it was you were doing :D

Details later. Rinny you should have cameee *whines*

I do pray I can get an autograph. A picture would be lovely though too XD

THEIHAVERETURNEDEDIT: I am working on an entry detailing the 3 days. Though I warn you. They will mostly consist of me fangirling and being all silly over 12012 XD

ITISDONEEDIT: Con reports are finished. Read to your heart's delight~

Quick update again :D

First, so sorry for not being able to comment and such properly. I apologize to all you guys. Tons of things have been preventing me from doing so however do know that I shall~

Point of this post is to tell dear yukari_rin  to get on AIM if not today tomorrow so we can discuss plans about Anime Next that's happening this Friday. Oh yes. You are going right? *prays* Meanwhile I'm at it, I have been able to catch the series you and Fuji-wifey have pimped to me and yes I can say that you two were absolutely right as usual XD. Will discuss ze details later. By the way, Fuji, did you get the new Oushou Chikubai doujinshi? Because TIME SKIP BABY!!!!!111 XDDD Just so you know I bought it and if you want I will scan it for you. Let me knoooow.

And if you're reading this- Kiku, we should have another Janne chat again with our fellow Janners the day yasu's solo debut drops or something of the like to celebrate. Y/Y? We are Janne afterall. *dork*

Last but definitely definitely not least:

Happy Belated Birthday sweet_chii

*throws obligatory confetti* I'm sure things went splendid for you dahling. Let me know what I can do for you. And yes I know I still have to send you that email. It will be done!

I pretty sure I'm forgetting something and I will edit this if and when I remember. Anyway, I do hope all of you are doing well and things are going the best they can. If not, it's not much but know that I'm always wishing you the best. And that I'm always there, not literally of course, if you need me in whatever way. ♥

PS- To the person who asked me- No, I don't have Ichizoku Fukkou. Woe. However, I did hear from a friend that besides the Oushou parts it's mediocre. And based on scans I have seen it seems that way. Good luck on finding it though. ^^

The cut below is filled with me being all angsty, bitchy and blah (I apologize in advance yo). Basically you get to know me better and realize how wrong that image of me you originally had is. So if you don't want none of it and want to be blissfully oblivious, don't read it so that means all of you.

( Yes we wear our masks. We keep them quite intact. And we don't want to know what's behind those faces. We harbor and conceal... )

I apologize once again. I don't like complaining and talking about such things so much. I feel very wrong when I do them even if it is my journal. Publicly like this is just odd. This whole thing is still strange to me. But I think overall it's good. It's teaching me to be more open with my feelings and life I guess...? Along with the fact that all of you have been sharing your personal lives with me so I feel it's only right I share mine as well and give you some insight to what type of crazy person I really am. It's only fair.

Also, thank you all for the comments to by last entry. Thank you. Omigod. Mitsuki you commented! I'm thrilled. *hugs you all* It's been a rough few weeks. The first few days were tough you can imagine. Non-stop crying, sadness, anger, denial and all the other things that one goes through when someone you love dies. I'm feeling much much better. My other dog was just as depressed. He's doing better too. I'm glad since I really did think he would die from the sheer loneliness and confusion of it all. It helped that we got a puppy. Yes, a German Shepherd puppy. A girl. Whose name is Hikari. I think you can guess why we named her that. I think... Who is very rebellious and hyper. Like him. She's actually very similar to him in various ways which me and my family find amusing. We wanted to get the same breed as Angel but couldn't because we couldn't find anyone who sold them and also they recommended we get a different breed due to comparisons we'd make between the new dog and him. And it wouldn't be fair to both which is understandable but personally the comparisons would just about go as far as looks. I know that no one will replace him or even come close and that I shouldn't expect one who could. So- I don't. It's all crazy around here. The puppy is draining me of my life force. Add the fact that I haven't been feeling well lately. Stress maybe? I'm literally dead. Next post, I will definitely try my hardest to upload the things I have to and be more happy I guess...? *laughs*

And because I'm such a dork: NaruHina FTW. And memo to Kishimoto- SasuSaku kthx.

Rinny and Fuji-wifey: When are you going to be on AIM so we can chat. We have much to talk about we do. Also Chelsea I will send you a reply to the email as soon as I can. I cannot wait! ♥

I'll get straight to the point, no beating behind the bush here. I just found out one of my dogs, Angel is diagnosed with a tumor in his prostate that has spread to his lungs. They are going to put him to sleep.

The worst part-

I'm not there with him to help him through this nor there is be with him once he's 'sleeping'.

I should have known. I really should have. I guess I'm just really naive and dense. Yet despite all that pain he must have been through he still was that playful rebellious prideful dog that I knew and loved. Even to the end. What can I say? It's basically all been say and yet not. Honestly, I don't think it's hit up with full impact yet. Sure, I'm crying my eyes and whimpering like a child but the fact that I'm not going to see him anymore and that he doesn't exist hasn't fully reached me. I don't think it will. At least not anytime soon.

Sorry for the angst and emo-ness flist. Really. You think that from losing two previous dogs this girl would be use to it.

The whole point of this post is the following:

Happy Birthday kikuko_kamimura! ♥

*throws confetti everywhere*

Even though in 10 minutes this whole day will be over however I simply do not care. And I'm definitely going to get you something. Perhaps yasu's debut? *_* Tell me if you have anything in mind. You are one of closest friends I have including IRL and you don't know how much your friendship means to me. I know that you are not having a good day and all but just know that you basically have me and my love at your whim. *UBER HUG* ♥ Now we will chat the night away. The AIM download is almost done it is.

Okay, so I was suppose to make a longer more detailed post today but I was too busy so tomorrow I shall. I will comment to everybody and try to post all the things I had originally planned to do. If not tomorrow, tomorrow. Procrastinate much, Lena? Also I will email you my response back Chelsea and we can go over the details. *loves you* Also Rinny-wifey- Tomorrow AIM time baby! XD Also Fuji-wifey, if you can. We need to exchange info yo and fangirl.

Okay, before I say what I'm about to say let me just say that I have to make this very quick since I'm already neglecting so many other things by posting already but I feel that I have to even if it's a short one filled with hardly any details other that the fact that yes I'm alive XD Sorries to fujiwara_san and yukari_rin for making you worry so much. I'm grateful for your concern. Really. Love you two wife-ies. *blows kisses* ♥

So. Once again it was the computer. Again? Yes I know. Honestly I think we all should be use to it or atleast get to even though I cease to do so each and every time @.@ Even now my computer is crappy. I'm pretty sure it's missing tons of components but I will make due or atleast try to. Anyway, I have tons of stuff to post. Mostly if not only things I said I would. The HanaNeji goodness for sei_shounagon. The doujinshi scans for annwyd, and various other things that I'm currently forgetting that I hope you, the flist, will remind me. But most importantly, my lovely wonderful spectactular wifey Fuji's birthday gift that is completely and utterly overdue. Sadly, what I have planned was lost. *see above* Which also explains why I wasn't able to send people their holidays gifts/cards since I lost your addresses as well along with the means of communicating.

Other than my dear friend kikuko_kamimura, who sent me mine therefore allowing me to send her one. Smart girl XD By the way, I will send you a letter back yo. I apologize for the lateness. And yes! I didn't miss your birthday. I was worried I did. Hopefully, we will be able to talk that day and celebrate! ♥

But I will make and give another thing for you Fuji-wifey. Whatever you want that I can do I shall. Let me know~

I think that's basically it though I'm sure I'm forgetting tons of things. There's also me working on revamping this thing. I'm currently in the mist of that and am almost done so look forward to the new look and all that jazz. I'll be commenting in all of your journal very soon especially those I promised I would. I'll update again whenever I can and elaborate further on everything but until then comment away with whatever. Catch me up on fandoms, your life, you or just spam to your heart's content!

Also, Rinny-wifey. Guess what? Ahem. I CAN GO TO ANIME NEXT! I already pre-reg for all three days. Oh yes. I'm praying you can go as well and we can hang out and stuff. I think you know what I'm talking about. XDD Let me knowwww so we can plan it all out.

Ja~

Edit: sweet_chii, hope you got my email yo. ♥
Edit#2: Thank you all for the comments. Truly. I love you all and I will definitely respond as soon as I can. <3 Right after I come back from ze guitar lessons tomorrow to be exact.
Edit to the Edit: I already responded to some of you. I couldn't help it! But more fun and comments tomorrow. *is shot*

And so another post. See. It didn't take too long, did it Fuji-wifey? *cough*

Tomorrow is going to be a very busy day for me. Which isn't a bad thing. Being busy I mean. We all say it, mean it and define it in a negative sense at times if not all the time but at least we are doing something, even if it just the simplest of things, with our lives. At least we are living in some sense of the word, right? I'm suppose to be helping out and marketing a product in Madison Square Garden's Theater. I have to lend a hand in helping setting everything up and selling the product before and after a concert. In exchange for experience in ze music industry and tickets to said concert playing that night. I'm very excited about it of course. It's my first time attending a performance or concert of that scale. Not only that but I took apart in it. Granted, it's not in the way I really would have like to but I'll take what I can get. That will all change eventually though. You just wait and see. *determined* XD

Gah. I am nervous. Maybe anxious? I know I'm hardly going to get any sleep tonight. I hope I do well and please my boss along with the customers. I also hope I don't get lost or lose any of my belongings. Or that I'm late. Or forget everything I'm suppose to say. And that I dressed appropriately. Or... You get the point. I have to say what I'm most wishing for is that I make an impression and I'm hired by the company. I would just love to have a job like that. Something that involves music since it's my eternal passion. You know, rather than working in those terrible, boring, unpleasant places like in those fast food restaurants my father wants me to do. I just couldn't settle for jobs of that sort or live my life without any 'excitement'. I won't. I doubt I will but I can hope and be utterly disappointed later.

I can babble on and on about this but I'll spare you. I do however have to thank dearest kikuko_kamimura. Your comment made me feel better and at ease somewhat. And you knew I was having troubles beforehand without me having to tell you! *laughs* So thank you. I'm going to try my hardest to have our nightly sessions as soon as possible. Most likely Tuesday. ♥ Maybe I can post pictures of the event. I'm not sure since they don't allow cameras and the like there. Not only that but I have no scanner and have to go to my friend's house again to do it which would be such a pain not only to me but to her as well. We'll see.

I was going to post sei_shounagon her needed ハナネジ. Even though it's really ネジハナ. But LJ isn't being nice so I can't today and my head hurts too much to fight back. Maybe Tuesday I will post them for you dahling.

Also a_white_rain- What was it that I said I'd try to scan for you? I completely forgot @.@

Goodnight to you all. Hope things are well with you. Wish me luck. I'll certainly need it. *wantstodieandbesparedofhumiliation*

And finally a post. I forgot to post for your return Fuji-darling. I'm an idiot who has a bad memory but this makes up for it... right? XD

Sadly, this one really isn't one at least I don't think so. My flist especially sahara_storm, yukari_rin-wifey and fujiwara_san-wifey demand and force ask I post so they can spam me since it's my birthday and for the not posting-ness XD. Along with the awesome kikuko_kamimura who I utterly adore and stalk who wanted me to post period. Though I'm pretty sure all of you one time or another asked me to post. So here it is!

Go ahead and spam me. *looks at a_white_rain* Say whatever, do whatever. Anything. Everything. As many times as you want :D

Enjoy yourselves! *is scared*

Also:



Advertising bleach_yurithon for dear brilliant annwyd. Join or stalk. Mostly join though. The hot yuri action compels you @.@ YOU CANNOT RESIST.

Last but definitely not least, I'd like to thank everyone who has wished me and gave me presents for my birthday. I'm really grateful and love you all. Especially the wife-ies- Fuji and Rinny. You two are the best and I'm very glad to have you two. *blows tons of kisses*

I had so many memes to post but due to my crappy computer I can't. So I'll just post the recent long meme that's been going around. Do it if you want I want you to.

( Meme of Love and Doom )

Along with wishing an early Happy Birthday to clocklike!
Have fun darling~ You deserve it. *hugs*

And that's it. I think. I feel like I'm forgetting something dammit. Oh yeah- IN ONE YEAR I'M LEGAL BABY! XD